30 on 30 (Nuggets of wisdom before hitting the big 3-0)

While the past decade has been the most crucial time of my being, I have learned so much along the way. In no particular order, I am sharing things that have made me wiser, cured my soul, lifted my spirit, and basically clichés that helped me in my pursuit of joy in life. This may or may not apply to everyone, but for those who want to know, just read on. (WARNING: Long post ahead, make sure to grab a cup of coffee to keep you awake)

1. The most important relationship you have (aside from that with God), is the one you have with yourself. I used to be a people pleaser, in turn it made me focus more on what people want me to become rather than what I wanted for myself. I would beat myself up with my insecurities from those projections that I forgot to be grateful for what I am as of the moment.
2. The less you know, the less it hurts is just as bad as the more you know, the more it hurts. At a certain point, I wished I was not burdened with certain truths. I wish I walked blindly so I could keep people in my life the same way I did. But the truth, no matter how painful is what always sets us free. Learn to accept that so you could move lightly in life.
3. It is never too late to dream a new dream. I shifted careers when I was 26. For a decade I was determined to be in the medical field, until I found a new dream job – to be a makeup artist. I loved what I did before, but I found something that makes my heart leap, makes me smile from so much joy, gave butterflies in my stomach – I knew then that I was falling in love harder for something more.
4. It is also never too late to love a new love. I was in a long-term relationship with someone until we both took parts ruining it. Back then I thought I was a failure for not being able to keep the relationship. It always seems nice to end up with your first love, but sometimes they are there in life to pass through – mostly as a lesson that teaches you. So don’t beat yourself up from the past, always choose to still give love when you can.
5. Time is a trickster. You can never take too much. So make sure that when you have a chance, you give too much.
6. Travel for fresh eyes. Travel gives you a new perspective about the world. You always come home a new person after.
7. Travel to heal. No better cure than hitting the road and walking away from it all. Promise you will come back like a new person, again just like number 6.
8. Travel solo at least once in your life too. It takes courage to do this but your heart will thank you for it in the long run. It is in my solo travels that I have my epiphanies and best realisations. It is also the time I felt the most courage in my entire being.
9. “It’s always darkest before the dawn”. I’ve always been struck with this line from a song by Florence and the Machine (Shake it out). On times I feel troubled, I always remind myself of that line. Next to the darkest time in life is light (the break of dawn). Just because you are facing a problem, doesn’t mean that you will be stuck there forever. There is always a breakthrough that will show you light.
10. The thing they say about “Do what you love and you will never work a day in your life” doesn’t mean it will always be easy. The hardships will always be there (and mind you, it will be the hardest that you will find yourself working because it is something worth keeping), it’s just the perception of work that differs. Every labor transforms to love and that changes everything.
11. In times of regret, always remind yourself of the “Silver Lining”. Much of are what if’s in life is a lesson learned. Be grateful for it.
12. The secret to confidence is comfort. Once you are truly comfortable with your own true self (not trying to fit a mold or a checklist on how to be anything) you will find yourself confident day by day.
13. The first step, is taking the first step. You can never start that idea in your head without taking “that first step”.
14. In chasing dreams, do SPRINTS.
15. Not everyone is given equal opportunities in life but GRIT always comes free. In the case of not being presented with a great opportunity, let grit work your way from ground up. It is always more fulfilling to work hard for something and achieve it, rather than cheat your way to success.
16. It is easy to get envious when you look at how people are going. Others would have it easy in life, but focus on yourself and don’t compare it to others. Refer to Number 15. Always remember that we move at our own pace.
17. When I teach makeup, I am always honest in admitting how thin my personal kit is and that it would only consist of an eyebrow pencil, a lip and cheek stain, an eye lash curler and mascara. Some days I throw in concealer and powder. You can live with that. But if you want a quick transformation, wear dark lipstick. It does wonders.
18. Be more conscious about the environment. You can start by bringing your own water bottle, skipping straws, keeping count of eco bricks you make, making sure you only get to fill few ones (to none) in a year, thinking 10 times if what you will eat is worth the plastic packaging you will throw (and I swear you will avoid eating it in the long run, eventually you will find alternatives). There’s a lot on the list thanks to people who make an effort to raise awareness. Take part in making the world a better place to live in. (will do a separate post on this one)
19. As much as we strive to be perfect humans, we can never be perfect. There will come a time that our words, thoughts and actions may hurt others. By or before the time we regret doing what’s done, learn to lower your pride, admit your mistake and apologize.
20. Try to change the time you spend lurking on the internet and read books instead. Some say it is an end of an era, but there is magic in opening a book and touching the crisp paper and smelling the sheets (TMI, am I the only one who smells my books?? HAHA)
21. The gym you invested in? The running shoes you purchased? The spinning class you availed? The yoga passes you signed up for? Don’t put all those to waste. Be active. Your body (and skin) will thank you for it.
22. It’s okay not to be okay. We have good days and bad days. If you are a girl, you have hormones that you battle with (mentally and emotionally) every single month as well. Don’t beat yourself up trying to be Stepford perfect. Acknowledge the days you feel down too so you can learn to understand yourself more.
23. Family is everything. Nurture it. Keep them close. Do whatever to keep it together. It is easy to be overwhelmed with life and neglect the people who are supposed to be closest to you. But, in the toughest situations, it is your family who you can run to.
24. My papa used to ask me what I wanted to be when I grow up and I responded “I just want to eat everything nice”. Never regret the good food that you ate, it is already in your stomach anyway.
25. Now this one is a pain to learn and, it took me years before I could fully come in terms with. But, always learn to forgive the inexcusable, because God did the same for you too. Whether we were offended once or many times, still choose to forgive. Still choose the little percent of goodness you see even if it is overpowered by a bigger percent of negativity. It takes a lot of effort to do this, but the weight lifted after will let you live life freely too.
26. “He has made everything beautiful in it’s time”. This verse from Ecclesiastes 3:11 is something I live by. This reminder helped me become more patient in waiting for God’s season for me. Time, the same with space heals and makes things beautiful. Even the violent and angry parts in our hearts and lives are cured in due TIME.
27. Another verse I hold closely (that I even had it inked in my ribcage last year) was Proverbs 4:23, “Above all else guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it”. Your heart should always come at top priority. In the bible, the heart is mentioned more than 900 times and it is translated in a lot of ways depending on context. Imagine how important your heart is for you to be so careless of? We care so much about our tangible possessions that we forget what really matters. Everything we do in life, our thoughts, actions, our innermost being, everything relies on it. Guard it.
28. Be humble. It is easy to be blindsided with wealth, achievements, popularity and the like, but remain humble. If we are to boast, boast only of His name, His word and His love.
29. Life will throw punches at you, and you will be knocked down in so many ways you can ever imagine. Keep standing. Life isn’t about the many punches thrown at you but the many times you stood despite all the blows.
30. Now we come to the last part, and it is always hard to conclude what to write in this part. I am leaving this blank in knowing that there are still more pages to fill in this life. It does not end or begin when you are 30. Between knowing and not knowing, let the unwritten parts surprise you. We may not always figure out what to do, but we can always seek guidance to the one who deem it best, GOD. Always walk with confidence in life, live it with purpose and put Him at the center of it all.

There goes my 30! For those who think I am still on my 20’s, secret’s out now! I always thought I would dread this day growing up. Turns out, it isn’t so bad after all.